A collected bride & groom who know when & how to make decisions because of a peaceful foundation is the strongest asset to a wedding day gone right.
So, you just got engaged and now everyone is asking you a million questions and you feel completely overwhelmed! Stop, drop, and read on sweet friend.
I want to share with you the tools needed to set you up for a successful wedding celebration! With just a few concepts in mind, not only will you and your fiance be laying a foundation to build a joyous and memorable event, but you will also be putting your needs first. A collected bride & groom who know when & how to make decisions because of a peaceful foundation is the strongest asset to a wedding day gone right.
1. Set realistic expectations.
Everyone wants their wedding day to be a dream come true, but sometimes reality can be a bit of a shock when you come down from a dream. When it comes to your budget, design, and vendors be realistic with the resources you have — don’t set yourself up for a letdown. Take stock of your budget, really make things line up, and stick to it! That’s what making a plan is for.
Don’t be afraid to take your time in making decisions with how you spend your budget. Weigh your options and ask for expert advice when it comes to matters you are unsure about.
I encourage couples to pick the top three things that are most important to them at their wedding (venue, food, decor, music, etc) and make sure their budget is invested wisely in those elements. You don’t want to go spending your whole budget in one place. But it’s nice to have set up from the get-go the line-items you are not willing to compromise on and what elements aren’t a necessity for your day.
Wedding planning is all about finding the perfect balance. It’s not always good, it’s not always easy, and it’s not always cheap. Pick your battles wisely based on your personal stress triggers and find your focus.
Expectations can also come in many other forms, from communication with your vendors to guest etiquette, and wedding day timeline. So be sure that you are open and communicate often with those around you who are involved in your day. They can be a shoulder to lean on and also a reassuring sounding board, but you do want to make sure you have cultivated the right type of expectations so that come wedding day no one is let down or left hanging, especially not you and your sweetheart.
2. Be a Guest at your own Wedding.
A lot of difficult decisions, countless hours, and probably some stressful nights went into making this day a possibility, and now you totally deserve to enjoy every single second of such a glorious and momentous day!
Make sure you have trusted professionals on your venue team, as they can answer questions you didn’t even know to ask!
If there are aspects of your wedding that you want to be on point hire a professional! It will save you stress & time trying to pull things together yourself.
A wedding planner can help you research vendors, construct a flawless timeline, and volley ideas that feel unattainable. A walk-through of a venue can lead them to see possible areas of concern and diamonds in the rough! A separate eye on the details can keep budgets balanced and guests happy all night long.
If you are stoked to DIY your wedding and save $$ there are many ways to do this without shying away from hiring folks that have devoted their time to a craft and have the passion to invest in your day and save you the time and headache that come with trying to do-it-all-yourself!
Having these individuals around you to educate you and make decisions on your behalf the day-of, like a wedding coordinator, can greatly alleviate the stress of trying to balance joy & logistics. You should feel free to soak in all the details and not have to make any last-minute decisions!
No cell phone, no clocks, no checking the timeline!! Have your maid of honor, best man, or someone else trusted take your cell phones for the day. They can make sure to capture some candid moments between you and your beloved while also making sure that you are focusing your energies in the right places.
3. Focus on Your Relationships
It is so important to remember this is a day not just about the new covenant bond and family you are creating with another, but about the bigger family you are bringing together. Your friends and family members have influenced your life and personality in various ways, and have helped shape you into the person you have become, the person who is getting married today.
Your wedding day is a special time to celebrate all of these relationships and to allow your loved ones to honor and support this new relationship you are stepping into. During your wedding planning, you want to make sure you are creating space for margin amidst the tasks and plans. This is essential because margin creates space for moments that last forever; space for relationships to grow, space for memories to be made, and space to be close to one another when it means the most.
Whenever you find yourself overwhelmed, feeling like you made the wrong decision, or exhausted by others expectations, take a moment to think about your favorite memory with your fiance! Also don’t be afraid to set aside time during wedding planning for date nights, getting together with friends (where you don’t discuss any wedding plans), or having a fun family dinner. Keeping up with your relationships and being there for your friends and family as life moves forward is crucial!
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